Tales of an Accidental Mega Mom pt. 3

This is the third installment of how I unintentionally (at first) became a mom to seven beautiful souls. 

Part 1.

Part 2.

This Tale is not a conversion story precisely, but the story of how and why we became a Catholic family is the catalyst for everything good, holy and true that we have done since. The growth of our family is definitely in that category!  This is just a brief retelling of the amazing things God did for our family that summer the twins were born.

{Jake, me, Ryan at about 20 weeks with twins}

Our new neighbors Mike and Kathy K. were so nice, but so       Catholic!

And talkative.

Many times I'd look out the window before going to get the mail or water the flowers to make sure Mike wasn't outside also.  Sometimes he's just chat and wave, but sometimes he's ask me some pretty uncomfortable questions like "So, do you believe that you can lose your salvation?"

Folks, I was heavily pregnant (I mean HEAVILY!) and I just couldn't deal with this pesky guy and his questions. These were not discussions I wanted to have. I just wanted to get my mail!

I pushed Lee to run interference. Lee is such an open person.  He is a genuine seeker and had no preconceptions about the Catholic Church really. He loved talking with Mike. Honestly, I just tried hard to ignore them both and waited for my babies to be born.

{in the nursery at about 31 weeks}

Just after the twins were born we were at a crossroads in our small group. Several discussions had broken out during our spring Bible study about free will, sin, predestination, holiness and so on. This uneasiness brewing in our group worsened and made me queasy. I thought it was just me being anxious and pregnant, but even after the babies were born the rift in our small group was growing and it was not just our family feeling that.

The church we belonged to, encouraged the small groups to split and re-form and thus to grow after about 18 months to two years. The summer after the twins were born (6/15/02) our group met just a handful of times and then disbanded.

During that summer, Lee had begun to read the pamphlets and books Mike K. had been passing on to him. I would glance at them from time to time, but I tried to ignore them mostly. Then, Lee began to discuss things with me directly. The things we talked about intrigued me, but I knew there must be a catch because I had been raised Catholic and never heard most of this stuff. It was very uncomfortable and humbling to dig around into our faith history and realize I was so ignorant

Finally, I headed to the library for myself. I needed a book I could read and explain all this crazy, silly, Catholic stuff to Lee once and for all from a former insider's perspective. I selected Why Do Catholics Do That? It looked to be a straightforward, thorough, historical account of  well, why do Catholics do all the stuff they do!

{we went to Disney World when the twins were four months-it wasn't actually as nuts as it sounds! We used points from Lee's work travelling and we had a great trip!}

I was blown away. I just love history. I have a BSed in history, but I'd truly never dug into Christian history. It was both fascinating and frightening.

I realized with growing horror that God was calling me to become Catholic! In fact, I vividly remember running up the stairs one evening and finding Lee in our bedroom.

"Honey, I think we're gonna have to become Catholic!" I shrieked.

He was was sitting calmly on the bed reading something and he glanced up at me, "I know. That's what I've been trying to tell you!"

So we made our way into the Church. Many friends were surprised, and alienated also. Family members were happy, shocked and disturbed. This was all around the time the scandals in Boston were all over the news.

Finally though we were home and you know, despite the varied reactions and disruptions, I truly felt at peace again. A peace I hadn't experienced in many years. There are more things to say about this conversion, the foray into RCIA for Lee, trying to attend mass the first few times with the four kids (4 and under), trying to meet other Catholics who were as hyped up for their faith as we were and so on. Maybe someday I can write down those experiences too.

But, back to our kiddos....

Although I entered the Church in solid faith and with full knowledge and total acceptance of Her teachings, even the teachings on sexuality, I had a small secret in my heart.

I was very, very glad I had already had my tubes tied before I came back to the Church.

Baby Steps

I am not a big Lent fan. I know many people who look forward to Lent as a time of spiritual growth and internal cleansing or whatnot, but I approach it with apprehension. I am faithful and dutiful, and simply, well resigned. 

{http://cartoonsbyjim.com/?sid=76}

Lee is almost gleeful about it. He is so much more generous in spirit about most things than I. He just loves a grand big gesture. More and more I am recognizing the Gollum in me and it seems that every sacrifice and surrender to God's will is just.so.hard. 

Thankfully most Lenten seasons since we returned to the Church have been joyful and incredibly rewarding despite my persistent grumpiness about the whole thing. 

This year I set my mind to have a Productive Lent. I made printouts for all of us, encouraged us to add prayers and so on and not just have sacrifices. The kids blew me away with their big plans. I'm talking big sacrifices and detailed prayer commitments. I mentally shrugged and let them write their promises down in their own folders. Who am I to say well it's a little much don't you think? 

My cynicism was not rewarded because they all followed through for the most part, and I witnessed the struggle they had to maintain their commitments. Very, very humbling is the faith and love of my dear children. 

I guess I could say that I kept my commitments too, but honestly it's not that big of a deal. I always make the slightest of promises and commitments, ones that are challenging enough so that I can keep my head up when I happen to be asked, "what did you give up?"  But not so challenging that I might actually, um, fail. 

One of the things I committed to was a certain amount of spiritual reading. First up on the docket was Happy Are You Poor by Fr. Thomas Dubay.

I was able to get it for my Kindle. So Lent starts on Ash Wednesday, you know? Well, I finished that little book before First Sunday of Lent. It was that absorbing to me. Then, I got Lee to read it and he also finished quickly.  By the time he finished, Lent had barely begun and all of my gentle, staid little Lenten commitments had been turned upside down. 

The Holy Spirit just swooped in and gave me a big shake (and then a big hug too I must add). This read has been an answer to our prayers and a wonderful guide of that infernal question we have had in our family for the last few years, "what next? where is God leading our family?" 

We have been praying this intermittently since just before I became pregnant with Josephine. Does this question lurk and linger in every household? Is it just ours? 

There have been times of clear purpose and direction for us, but also times of fog and deep restlessness and while the gift of Josephine has illuminated the path for a time, it was beginning to get dim again. 

And then we read this book!

I hope to elaborate more but for now, our baby step has been to put the house for sale and to begin saving for the purpose of buying a new home, with some land and buying it outright and not having a mortgage at all. 

I must also share that I found the awesome blog House Unseen not too long after we made this decision and we feel that the Borobia's example has been a real sign to us of God's direction for our family. 

Tales of an Accidental Mega Mom pt. 2

This is part the second of how I unintentionally ended up with seven kids. To start at the very beginning (a very good place to start- I have to sing that in my Maria vonTrapp voice, do you? ) click here.

Pt.2

So there I was at the ripe old age of 27 having decided that 4 kids for me was quite enough thankyouverymuch. I did have 4 kids under the age of 4 though so it's not like I was slacking.

We had married in the Episcopal church and we ended up having our kids baptized, but we never became members and just before I became pregnant with the twins, we joined a new church that was non-denominational.

The pastor there is an incredible speaker. He is known worldwide and has several books and can be seen on television. Today this church has several campuses where they holographic-ally project him as he gives his sermons. Maybe this is an urban legend, but a friend of a friend tells of one woman who attended a satellite campus for a few weeks before realizing that it wasn't actually him up there on the stage.

When we attended about 10-11 years ago they were just getting started, and by this I mean there was one campus and they only has about 3-4,000 families. So to get people connected, the church sponsored small groups and we joined one to meet some couples we could get together with and discuss our faith and become friends. It really is a great idea and we met some wonderful families.

Our group had about 5 couples and we were all roughly the same age and had small kids. We had just moved to a beautiful, large McMansion home when I was pregnant and so we became the weekly hosts. We would choose a book and we'd all read it and discuss it. We also had a babysitter come and watch the kids and everyone would bring some food for dinner.

It was really great y'all. We'd pray for each other and support each other. I think this is a great model that many Catholic Churches could benefit from.

Anyway, one day after we'd had our group over the night before, I was talking with one of our new neighbors, Mike K. He and his wife were empty nesters and just real friendly. Somehow the topic of what all those people were doing over came up and how they were from our church and all.

And then somehow it came up that I was a lasped Catholic.

And then somehow it came out that Mike K. was a practicing and devout Catholic.

And soon we learned that he was also an amateur Catholic apologist...

{PHFR} + Tales of an Accidental Mega Mom

Well the charger to my fancy camera is still missing. In fact, I think I might have accidentally put it in the Goodwill bin when I was cleaning out my desk. I feel pretty bad about it, but my mom can do one better, she accidentally put our family heirloom handmade baptismal gown in the Goodwill bag when they were moving.

I know!

But after a good cry we were over it and we do have another gown because we needed one when we had the twins baptized, so I just told her we have a new family heirloom now...but I digress.

Also my phone isn't syncing so I can't post any new pictures and therefore I have been inspired to do something a little different today!

I can't tell you how many times I get comments on our family size and how close together in age they all seem.

Truly y'all, all.the.time.

These days the questions don't phase me much. In fact seven kids seems like hardly any kids on some days...except on days when it feels like hundreds!

The real true life story of how we, who never intended to have a 'big' family ended up with seven (so far) blessings is pretty amazing, but also kind of long so I don't really go into detail when folks make those charming little comments...

I would like to tell you though, dear blogosphere.  We always seem to have plenty of time, don't we?

Here goes:

We married on June 14th 1997. I was 22 and my groom was 23. Weren't we adorable little babies?!

{pretty, pretty young!}

I was raised Catholic, Lee agnostic-ish and we ended up getting married in the Episcopal Church because that's where my Mom ended up. I didn't really care and neither did he and my mom did, so that's what happened. 

We knew we wanted to be parents soon. For some paranoid reason I was totally convinced we would have trouble conceiving so of course I became pregnant after we'd been married five months. 

Jake was a darling, easy baby and we thought, hey let's have another! Jake and Ryan are 14 months apart and are best friends.  

When Ryan was nearing two we really wanted to complete our family. You see, when we married I said I wanted 4 kids and Lee said 2 kids, so 3 kids was our compromise.

So cute, so super cute and dumb we were. 

{happy no.1 and no.2}

Imagine then, our shock when the doctor saw Baby A and Baby B on the ultrasound!

Yes, I did think "Ha! I win! I win" :)

Plus Baby B was a girl so that was pretty awesome.

{Ha ha! Twins! Funny!}

And then? Well, I am not one of those ladies that just loooooooves to be pregnant. In fact, I loathe it. I always have morning sickness, terrible, dehydrating sickness that can tend to make me depressed. The twin pregnancy did me in y'all. I was miserable at the end. I had been on bedrest for about 4 weeks with toddler boys at home.

But, even before the very end, we had decided that this pregnancy was it. We were done with four and very happy and thankful. So, when the delivery ended up in a c-section the doctor went ahead and did what I had very explicitly and repeatedly asked him to do over the last nine months. He cut and cauterized my fallopian tubes. 

Yes. I had my tubes tied when I was 27. 

{real, 4 is enough}

Thanks be to God there is more to this story. Much much more, so stay tuned!

{PHFR}

Been a sick week. :(

This has been the worst winter for us sickness wise in years. No vomiting, thank God, but fevers and sore throats and tummy aches and sleeplessness making us all around a pretty grumpy bunch. You know how some people are just better patients than others? Well this sick princess is definitely not a good patient.

{real}

She is just miserable poor thing, and tends to make everyone miserable along with her. 

Lee said to me the other night how God must love me so much because he is giving me such wonderful opportunities for extra penance this Holy Week....yep. Trying to be optimistic here...

{happy}

My step dad just turned 70 and this past weekend we had a great surprise party for him. Luke was thrilled to have Coke at the party because he has given up all drinks except water for Lent. I told him it was a special occasion and he had an exemption. I pretty much made that up I guess, but it really was such a hassle in the crowd and the server just wanted to get the kids all served quickly.

{funny}

While at the doctor with Sara I found a recipe in Parent's mag. for breakfast cookies made with carrots and oats with a cream cheese filling. Sounds too good to be true right? I mean cookies for breakfast? Woo Hoo!

Unfortunately I couldn't make myself tear out the article and I forgot my phone which I usually use to make pics of stuff like this. I tried to find it on the interwebs when I came home, but no luck. 

So I improvised.

{funny}

I remembered the recipe called for a cream cheese filling sweetened with maple syrup but I didn't have any and I just used agave. It worked great! Seriously it was so easy, just beat the cream cheese and add in agave to taste. YUM! I sure love me some cream cheese frosting and now I know how to make the easiest, yummiest frosting in the world! In fact, I'm going to use it on my lamb cake...

{pretty}

The cookies turned out delicious and I guess they are sorta healthy. The kids love them and I will make them again for sure!